The Bottom of Forever

You haven't crossed my mind in a long while. There hasn't been much time for you to take up and not enough room in my brain to keep you around. I've been too busy trying to live without you to remember that I loved having you in my life.

Do you remember the time we went to the beach? The last time we ever loved each other? Everything seemed like it was going just fine, like we were nowhere near the edge of the universe. Then all of a sudden I found myself being pushed into the abyss of nothing when you decided that we weren't worth the effort anymore. I opened my arms wide and let the vast nothingness swallow me whole. I'd forget about you when I found the bottom of forever.

Eventually I landed back in the life I had before you came along. It was so fucking annoying how unequivocally the same it was. You were so easy to erase out of my life and I resented that. The time we spent together and the love we shared was too wonderful for it to be this easy to forget. But I guess that's what you always wanted, to be part of the forgettable. Life is easier when you're too high on the next excitement to remember the lows.

But I loved you, damn did I. Looking at you was easy and hearing you talk was hard because you weren't as smart as me, but I didn't care because you were so kind. You were so pretty. But I couldn't stand to look at you after you left.

Even when I'm certain you won't always love and remember me, I know for a fact, my own infinite truth, that I will always love and remember you. Maybe not constantly, but sometimes when you show up in my thoughts. You'll cross my mind and I'll smile until it starts to fade at the thought of all the damage you caused to my soul, but I'll push you out of my mind before the pain metastasizes. I'll always think of you as the universe before the nothing you sent me to. I hope you'll think of me as someone worth pushing.

---

Inspired by The Wandering People
When was the last time you
​thought of someone else?